i fully admit i've been really struggling lately!! it's christmastime, i'm missing my husband, and feeling snackier (and flabbier) than ever. rather than motivating me, the flab is depressing and then i eat another slice of pumpkin cream cheese bread. what the dealio?!!
i want to look amazinggg for my husband when he returns from this year-long deployment...but it's just not happening. it was easier in the summertime when there were still several months to go. i was wrapped up in a routine....running almost daily either inside at the gym or outside in the warm, beautiful sunshine. i miss my feet hittin' the pavement, chemical brothers blasting in my ears. *sigh*
then i picked up zumba and that has been SO fun. but if i am flabby now, after ALL this exercise....i hate to think of what shape i'd be in if i'd done nothing this year to keep fit. it's been very frustrating, and a hard pill to swallow, entering my thirties and realizing my super crazy high metabolism DIED on me, and for the first time ever...i actually had to work at it.
so...i'm currently in a rut. and how do you get OUT of a rut when you completely lack motivation?? i was talking to my friend and zumba instructor the other day about "faking it 'til you make it." i guess this means i need to commit and do it whether i feel like it or not. and that is HARD. do ya feel me??
i struggle with this is many areas of my life. it's easier said than done. it takes a LOT to get out of bed when that's the last thing you want to do. it takes so much strength to walk into that room of strangers and start mingling when you're dying inside. but you fake it 'til you make it. or, as i like to say...FEEL THE FEAR, AND DO IT ANYWAY!!!
today, for example...i'm feeling sad and lonely. i'm feeling flabby and unmotivated. i'm feeling cold and tired. so, where am i going to find the power inside me to overcome all this and exercise?? just gotta make the choice and DO IT. and i've found that choices become easier when you've made the decision long before decision-making time arrives. therefore....i CHOOSE to have some sort of exercise today for a minimum of thirty minutes. there. i've committed.
and you are all my witnesses. *hugs*
